The Write Idea Forum Index The Write Idea
A forum for writers
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

Bonekickers
Goto page 1, 2, 3  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    The Write Idea Forum Index -> Recommendations
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
DavyAbram
Guest





PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 3:34 pm    Post subject: Bonekickers Reply with quote

This may be the wrong place to recommend a TV programme, and I have to confess that I've only watched one out of the first three episodes, but I have to mention this piece of truly awful dross for (at least) two reasons.

The whole sorry enterprise is about a quartet of unconventional, wisecracking, maverick archaeologists who shout a lot and have adventures, and if your instinctive response to that is to make sure the safety's off and there's a round in the chamber, then you're pretty much on the right track. It's the same gut reaction as that early encounter with the sado-masochistic albino assassin monk in the Dan Brown thing. You expect the worst, and that's precisely what you get.

Anyway, here's why you should still watch it. Firstly, Bonekickers is, quite possibly, the most laughably dreadful "drama series" the BBC has ever commissioned, and should be required viewing for anyone contemplating writing a screenplay, in terms of "under no circumstances do it ANYTHING like this unless you want to be laughed at".

We're talking serious bad here; plot lines, dialogue, characterisation, casting, lighting, editing, special effects, background music - all completely atrocious. If Bonekickers isn't in the "Dire Warning" section of every film studies course in the country within a couple of years, then I'm not a bald, portly Irishman with a bad attitude. And I am.

Secondly, while I'm not often a supporter of the "so bad it's almost good" school, d'you know, it almost is. After flinching and rubbing my eyes in disbelief a few times during the first five minutes I started to snort and giggle quietly to myself, a response I maintained for the rest of the show. I shall be watching the rest of the series, because, having found a programme that can make me laugh out loud after spending all day writing press releases about plasterboard I'm not going to turn my back on it.

On a scale of one to ten, Bonekickers is off the scale. In both directions.
Back to top
delph_ambi
Whittaker Fiction Winner 2009


Joined: 24 May 2007
Posts: 7457
Location: images of elsewhere

PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 4:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree. It's hilarious. I've chortled my way through every episode.

I love the way the archaeologists tell each other basic history stuff that I learnt in primary school; the way they then lurch into wince-making lovey-dovey greetings-card-speak; the way they ALWAYS end up in a vast underground cavern with artefacts that can't possibly be there in that sort of condition, with either Roman hand grenades, latter-day sword-wielding templars, or mad Americans shooting at them; etc etc.

An archeaologist pal of mine tells me that in twenty years of being a full-time archeaologist she has only met one archaeologist from an ethnic minority (Bonekickers is very PC and has two ethnic archaeologists out of the four regulars). She also tells me that tests they do in Bonekickers in minutes actually have to be sent to Poland, where the testing takes a good three weeks. The list is gaffes is endless. That fat and jolly archaeologist, Mark Horton, from 'Coast' was the consultant apparently. I hope he's hanging his head in shame.

Absolutely compulsive viewing. Toe-curlingly brilliant. Watch it!
_________________
Website
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
JonP
TWI Fiction Writer of the Year 2010


Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 2493

PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 4:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

We're all big fans in our household. It really is the best thing that's been on TV since The Borgias.
_________________
My website
Take It Cool
Dot Dash
Mrs Darcy versus the Aliens
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Carol



Joined: 16 Dec 2004
Posts: 917
Location: Burton on Trent

PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 6:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's brilliantly bad. Me and my lad are hooked.
_________________
You can change your nationality, you can change your husband but you can't change your football team
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Steffi
Whittaker Fiction Winner 2011


Joined: 27 May 2007
Posts: 1072
Location: North London, UK

PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 10:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

We love it here, too... although we're still scratching our heads as to why you would put Paul Nicholls (the more bloodthirsty young Knight Templar in the first episode) if you didn't want a broad Bolton accent... and then dub half his lines with someone else's voice!

Ok, so I watched the first ep purely on the basis of the fact that the aforementioned Mr Nicholls is rather tasty (and seems to get cast as mad people a lot, which may be explained by the fact his mother is a psych nurse) but every now and then I like to watch something where I can just switch of my brain and enjoy the ride.

And as for the science of it all... I got a double A* in my Science GSCE, which still boggles me as I'm not sure which end of a test tube is which, so whatever mumbo-jumbo they spout on these shows is all fine by me! Wink
_________________
"I have to write because if I donít get something down then after a while I feel itís going to bang the side of my head off." - Terry Pratchett

Visit my blog: Little Things
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
leatherdykeuk
TWI Forum Member of the Year 2010


Joined: 26 Jul 2005
Posts: 11143
Location: Derbyshire UK

PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 7:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like it too. I haven't shouted at the screen so much in ages.
_________________
The Laverstone Chronicles
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Gypsy



Joined: 20 Jul 2008
Posts: 20
Location: Scottish Borders Scotland

PostPosted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 3:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I hope it get repeated because there always seems to be something else happening when it's on.

I don't suppose anyone has watched Channel 4 at 9p.m. on a Wednesday night, "Personal Services Required". No, not about a brothel but about people (like yours truly) working as housekeepers or personal assistant type people. My boss was actually approached and refused because the last time she appeared on something her home got robbed about two days later. But I have never seen so many truly awful people, both the employers (all totally bonkers, or bone idle or both) or the prospective employees, many of whom seemed to class themselves well above doing the work they were applying for. All totally contrived to make for quite entertaining viewing. I think it was the last episode this week, and I can honestly say there wasn't one employer I would have worked for. They were all absolutely dreadful. You had choices like the Doggy Hotel people who had their boarders sitting at the table eating off a china plate, or the snooty woman who insisted her poor young helper wear a chauffeur's hat to drive her to Tesco's!! The final episode had two teenage girls living with their father, who already employed an au pair who seemed to do nothing?
When one of them was asked to set the table for guests, she took a total strop and demanded to know why she should need to do that when he was employing someone. Oh dear!! Stroppy little brats, who will make some poor geezer's life hell.
_________________
Bricks and mortar make a house,
love makes a home.

www.patsygoodsir.com
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
stu



Joined: 25 Jul 2008
Posts: 133

PostPosted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 8:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Interestingly silly, but inclined to make me fume, and I've only taken a couple of archeaology courses in amongst a bunch of history ones. I particularly love the way everything seems to be perfectly preserved and neatly positioned.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
mike noakes



Joined: 14 Mar 2007
Posts: 1296
Location: Chester

PostPosted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 9:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with almost everything that Davy has said. The wring is totally cringe-making, and the acting similarly bad. The only disagreement I have is that it is not compulsive viewing for me. I can find no saving grace, even in its' ineptitude. I am losing the will to live.

mike
_________________
Just trying to make some sense of it all, as I reach the age of reflection.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
PaulH



Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 83

PostPosted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 11:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I watched about the first ten minutes of the one with the 'slaves' in the Bristol Channel. It was trying so hard to be right-on and ultra-PC that I almost puked... then the archaeologist woman started getting attacked by something akin to voodoo. It went from PC to stereotyped black villain in one scene switch! Dear God, it's awful. I saw the beginning of another one - the coloured lassie said 'Boadaceia' and the others all tutted and corrected her to say Bouddica. How the hell did she become an archaeologist?

Sorry, it's just so incredibly badly done that I can't watch it as a drama, and so desperate to be trendy and ethnically correct that I can't treat it as a comedy. It's so bad, I'd actually suspect that the government had it written, except none of the cast seems to be a wheelchair bound lesbian.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Alan
Celery Winner 2005 & TWIt Booster


Joined: 16 Dec 2004
Posts: 5201
Location: Too near to the screen

PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 7:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I found it to be thought provoking drama.

I thought - what's on the other channel?

Cool
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
DavyAbram
Guest





PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 3:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy
Back to top
FatMonica



Joined: 24 Jan 2005
Posts: 1327

PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 10:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I haven't had the pleasure-?- of seeing it yet but I'm gonna!!
Sounds like a good laugh.
_________________
'Be the change you want to see in the world'

www.chasingart.blogspot.com
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tapes



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Posts: 413
Location: Formby

PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 7:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It gives you hope that standards at the BBC mustn't be unassailably high if they'll commission tosh like this. As our esteemed starter says it is jaw droppingly, unbelievably bad. In our house we try to guess what line someone will say at any given point where a decent writer might avoid the obvious cliche and this dear little drama gives you the cliche every time...wouldn't miss it!
And would it hurt to make the mai character, Magwump or Mugwai or whatever her name is just a tad sympathetic some time to some one? I've been rooting for the bad guys since day one wanting someone to top her...and as for Google with a beer gut 'Dolly' Parton.....uuuuuuurgh
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Alan
Celery Winner 2005 & TWIt Booster


Joined: 16 Dec 2004
Posts: 5201
Location: Too near to the screen

PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 7:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'll have 50p on:

"Let me through I'm an archaeolgist"


Oh go on, I'll make it a pound and have:

"Ye canna change the laws of physics."

Shocked
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    The Write Idea Forum Index -> Recommendations All times are GMT
Goto page 1, 2, 3  Next
Page 1 of 3

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group